i think I'm mourning the loss of Frankie now =( he was sent to two different hospitals, and i had prayed that they could save him, but just last week, they told me he was unrepairable... that he needed a new.... motherboard ....
devastation hit me.. and then they shot me with the last piece of bad news.. in seven apologetic words, they killed me...
"Sorry, your harddrive couldn't be saved either..."
....... Frankie, R.I.P .....
ha ha, emo crap aside, yeah, pretty bummed that Frankie couldn't be saved.. apparently his motherboard is fried.. so sigh, there goes all my music, pictures, everything...
i guess the part where I'm most bummed is that i cant listen to my weird eclectic music in peace.. my ipod isn't updated, plus its gone wonky too, so that means i have to resort to downloading songs off Grumpy's laptop, and making my own playlists.. but i feel guilty whenever i see the pained look on his face when yet another punk-rock song comes on, so i surrender the Windows Media Player to his choice of music.. cause it IS HIS LAPTOP.. =(
my taste in music just can seem to compromise with his =(
speaking of music, last night i covered Charly to work the cloakroom for the "Nas" gig at the Great Hall in the Cardiff Student Union.. was my first time working a gig at the Great Hall, plus it was with Melina, so it was cool.. got my first Access All Areas pass, cause the security was pretty tight, due to the college shootings at the Pretty Ricky Concert in Loughborough University... they set up metal detectors that were set to 'maximum security level' so ANYTHING metal beeped.. so in came poor uni kids without belts on cause their belts had caused the detectors to go off..
and due to the high security measures, the concert was late to start.. which caused some people to be dissatisfied.. =s ... well, 30pounds for a 2hour show? yeah id be pissed too...
but thank god nothing major happened... and Melina, who had left early, was a sweetheart to call when i finished my shift to ask if everything was okay.. prolly thought i was shot =p hahaha
| do you feel like a man, when you push her around? Do you feel better now as she falls to the ground?|
i think living in a foreign country, you are more likely to be influenced by external stimuli.. things that never used to bug you, or never used to get to you, once you are out of your comfort zone, you are more prone to take it to heart...
it takes character to stick to your principles when they are held at gunpoint... its easier to say "i would NEVER do that" when you're reading an article about another persons life-story, but when it happens to you yourself, would you do the same thing that you swore you would never do?
the other day, my principles were somewhat questioned, leaving me in a state of confusion on what to do... should i succumb to peer pressure, or stick to my beliefs?
in times like these, you need someone to hold up that mirror so you can take a good look at yourself.. i thank god that the one person that has never let me down in the past, did not let me down this time.. she reminded me of who i was, what i was capable of, and said all the right things that i needed to hear at that moment..
when the enemy is yourself, victory and failure has no relevance.
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|8:53 PM|